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Guide to safely choking your partner during sex

You must already know that I love nasty, slutty, rough as fuck sex.

If you objectify me while you fuck me, then treat me like your personal fuck doll I will be begging you to abuse me. At that point, you can do just about anything you desire to me. The more selfishly you fuck me; the hornier I get, the more I squirm like a whore and scream like a banshee while I cum on your cock.

For me, the nastiest way to use me is to choke me while you fuck me. I love to feel your cock go rigid inside me as you grasp my neck. I adore feeling the rush of horny go straight to my pussy as your hands tighten around my neck.

It's time now for a sensible health warning.

💖 Consider the risks involved before you introduce choking into your play. 💖 If choking is done incorrectly it can hurt or even kill people. 💖 Make sure that you carry out your RACK (Risk Aware Consensual Kink) before starting this or other styles of breath play. 💖 Never choke anyone or take part in any breath play without the enthusiastic consent of both partners 💖 Discuss boundaries and safe words beforehand. 💖 Never tie anything around someone's neck as part of your breath play or choking.

It's now time for the sensible legal warning

Make sure you know the local laws. These differ depending on where in the world that you live. There are some jurisdictions where partners are unable to consent to have either the oxygen or blood stopped from entering the brain. This means that if you even have the enthusiastic consent of your partner, the law will overrule you making the act illegal. Please recognize that I do not advocate stopping the blood to oxygen from reaching the brain in any part of this blog. It's about sensations and power exchange.

So how do you choke like a pro

Choking is not strangling someone. So it is important to know what you can do safely and what you should not do. If you get this wrong you can hurt someone.

Never squeeze the windpipe

This is the bony bit at the front of the neck. Never push down or put weight on this. It is fragile, it can get damaged and can cause injury.

Whenever you take a grip around your partner's neck, always push upwards. Push towards the head under the law, not down on the windpipe. You must push up not down. Always squeeze the sides of the neck rather than the front onto the windpipe. Feeling the pressure underneath the jaw gives the same thrill and power exchange, but with less risk of injury or restricting any oxygen.

Do practice runs with your partner before choking them during sex. Talk about choking, where your hand should go and understand what it will feel like, as well as for the person doing the choking, they can gauge the correct amount of force. Get a sense of what it feels like before you bring this into the bedroom, get horny and possible careless.

Always have a safeword

If you are practising BDSM or rough sex you should always agree a safeword in advance. If either partner says the safeword then everything must immediately stop. Restraints removed and only then you should talk about why a safeword was used. If your play involves gags then make sure you have agreed to a visual signal. My visual signal is to give ‘the finger’, or perhaps a small bell that I hold on to which I can be dropped as an alternative.

Be firm, never use force

If you are the one choking, show some control. Remember this is a power exchange, not a murder scene. Always keep your grip high and push up never down. Take a firm grip with your hands and never lean into your partner adding additional force or weight. Your partner is relying on you to get them off, not to hurt them. It is your responsibility to do this safely.

It’s a great time for dirty talk

Sir always makes me talk like a whore while he is choking me. Apart from the extra humiliation and being degrading, I am giving him confidence that I am conscious and that he is not applying too much force.

If you have ever wondered, I sound like the girl from The Exorcist when I'm being choked, but my head does not spin, I promise.

‘Look at me’ and keep eye contact

Sir insists that I look at him while he is choking me. He will settle for nothing less than direct eye to eye contact. Between the choking, making me talk like a slut and forced to look directly into his eyes, I give up all control to him. I also know that my safety is his top priority.

Being choked, being forced to look at him and trash talking like a whore in a brothel is hot as fuck. A girl could not ask for more from a man while he fucks her, could she!

Missionary position rocks for choking

For me facing one another is a vital part of being choked. However, I am going to want to be pounded while you are choking me. Missionary position is the top way to fuck me hard, deep and nasty while you choke me all at the same time. I am sure that other positions work too, but I want to be face to face. No other position seems to meet my primal need in the same way as a guy on top of me, all his weight leaving powerless, all while I am struggling to breathe.

Take breaks from choking

Once you start choking it's not a bad idea to stop regularly after a short while. Not only does this allow the one being choked to recover their composure, but it also reduces risk allowing you to check-in. It also gives multiple starts and the whole process of having my neck grabbed gets me wetter every time.

Choking is all about power and dominance

Never forget choking is not the main event. It’s how it makes the other person feel whether that is dominance or submission, it is all about power exchange. I’m told that for some people the neck is an erogenous zone which adds to the experience. Others find it amplifies their orgasm. Some love the risk or taboo nature and get off to breath play. Your motivations are not as important as how it makes you feel.

Just so you if you choke me like you hate me while you fuck me I will be a total whore for you as I love it.

Health Warnings for all the stupids out there - Choking is dangerous. Never take any risks. You are within your rights to set this as a hard limit and your partners should always respect these wishes. If choking is not your kink that OK too, but do not choose to impose your choices on me or others. That is called ‘kink shaming’.